These Gifts, This Maker

created by Michelle Xiao

I look at this painting and sigh.   A blank canvas lay on a shelf somewhere until.........And then brushes were assigned by steady, skillful hands, colors spilled out and settle,  then all is still when  first touch of paint smears canvas.

Magical.

The day he was born was too.  I lay awake wondering if the pains were real labor, were those that ushered babies into air and light.   And when I saw him in that climax and the trauma fell away like a heaving wave falling into mist, I collided with the unearthly, the indescribable, and the miraculous.  And we, suspended in awestruck wondering, were incapable of understanding how our regular, clumsy, reckless living could have ushered in this designed perfection.

 A perfect child......and I/we had done this....yet not, but only willing participants in this glorious design set in motion before I was.  Who formed the lungs that pull life in from the air, highlighted each strand of chocolatey hair, sketched sinew to bone, decided the heart's rhythms inside of me?  Never could I even  attempt what God flings forth in just a breath.  Yet, we created with our Creator...and because of Him.

 For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
^{......................................................
16} Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed

And I stand amazed that the greatest thing that I've accomplished this far is the one thing that I had so little to do with.     In only "being" and then availing myself, this miracle was set in motion, and me along for the ride.

 ¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.

And I blush at the thought that it would be harder for me to render the painting above than to co- create ( To create together) this child with God!    And there lying sneakily in that truth is another; our most pivotal moments are those born out of a surrender;   the birth of a son, our own birth,  death, our birth into the Kingdom. 

Our first son, Ty --and Dad

And going beyond this idea, what compels us from deep within are  these gifts given in darkness (Romans 12:4-8) set just inside flesh and blood, those which express unique humanity, and a part of a larger body of glory;  the body of Christ himself.........And how explosively powerful this is, and yet how easy in surrender.   And the blasts of "us" can be felt for generations.  

Yes, the painter paints, and this is easy for her........she is gifted, brilliant,  and she can't help but express the uniqueness that is beautifully hers alone. The teacher builds bridges of knowledge as she also builds up the Kingdom, the drummer lays the foundation of song leading the saints in praise, the gardener paints in flower and foliage urging worship to God.  These gifts given  in darkness, they long to be brought into light.  And when they shine in sweet display, they remind of the skillful One who worked in secret. 

 When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.

  I knew a man who worked with iron and earth. And when he had finished a job, he would  drive us to the job site to see a yard  expertly sculpted, or a new pond with molded earth ring around,  a new winding road made from shale.  In his heart was kindness, mercy, and a heart that gave extra and charged less.   And when death visited our town, he would kindly dig a perfect grave and always for free.   He seemed to see himself a simple man, felt uneducated according to the standards of today,  but this idea was sorely lacking.  And in his work was his transformation;  out of this simple fellow would emerge a "hero" who felt he could do anything and against any odd in his field of work.   And when he died a whole town mourned for him and at his funeral a slip of paper was passed to me from a lady who knew him for the man he was and the work he did (his creating).  On the slip was his obituary and at the top she had penned her description of him;   it read,  "A God Man".  I  wept at the three words as I sat in the shadow of his casket,  and at this "simple" man who rallied such words and such love.  His death ushered a perfect conclusion, one that spoke of one great name, "Creator". It shouted "God" without a word--- and for all to hear.  

Ms. Angie's words

And someone heard.

Always being our hero on his backhoe

Elijah wanted to be like Papaw at 3 years old, and still does at 14.


And I sit imagining about Him; the extravagant, marvelous, lavish Maker.  And for days wondering who I am in relation to Him and what His gifts in me and you mean in relation to our world; what a complete surrender of all of them would mean.  And it seems  something like the heaving wave falling into mist. 

  And knowing that He, indescribably wonderful---He imagined me and imagined you.  And not stopping there, He, at a specific time in history, at a special time of year, and a designated time of day or night, unveiled some of what He'd done in secret.  Unveiled at our birth the secret work of the womb.  And as we surrender to His plan for us and surrender the gifts residing, I wonder if we too will shout His name in the end?  Shout of His greatness, speak of His love that stretches into the forever.

And we were meant to bless Him with all that is inside of us......those gifts implanted by the Almighty.  And
 as we live on-- the unveiling continues, showing that we are more than flesh and blood.  And who we are is easy to be, if we only we will surrender.  And we can shout his name in the end.

 You covered us in our mother's womb ...................
...and skillfully wrought us

 And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.
(Excerpts from Psalms 139)