Tuesday, June 26, 2012

On being late to the meeting........

I was reading a new favorite blog today and it reenforces in me that I am not alone in the stirrings of my heart. In fact, I am so "not alone" in my new burdens, awarenesses (not a real word maybe, but you get it), passions, and longings that I have begun to feel late for a meeting that everyone knew about but me. It would be the "meeting" for all who are called to especially consider the plight of the orphaned in the world, to consider their part in the work to care for them, for those who are called to adopt a child without the love of a family........."THAT meeting".

My everyday world would tell me that I'm a little out of step watching video after video about African orphans, AIDS, wars that leave orphans, and the like. I have a giant chunk of a book on my bed stand called "Africa" that I'm immersed in. In my everyday world I can't even share with one friend the deep stirring in my being, the laying awake at night, the times I loose my appetite, and the times I ignore it in order to relate to those without food. Maybe I could share, but maybe not without causing awkward, speechless pauses. But, because of this amazing portal of constant dialogue called emails, Face Book, and blogger accounts, I can hear from people who not only understand, but are miles and miles ahead of me with their testimonies cheering me on in whatever God is calling me to in this area. Fantastic.

So here's to all those who've opened up their hearts in the form of a blog account. Here's to those willing to share their heart, their story, a piece of their life with strangers and friends. Here's to the camaraderie that can be felt between people who are miles apart and have never met face to face. I am not alone in my calling.......not alone at all. ♥♥♥

Sunday, June 24, 2012

It's Time to Jump.

For over a week now, there seems to be a theme coming at me from heavenward; "Take a leap of faith, girl; JUMP!" Since the time I started this blog which no one could see until today but me, to now, I've been coming to an understanding of a new call on our life, the call of adoption. I was so timid about it at first, not wanting to speak it out even, but holding it in my heart with awe and amazement. "Could God be calling us? "Are we even worthy of this?" "Could we walk this road of faith to it's conclusion of bringing a new child, two new children even, into our family?" "Am I wrong about this, and will I look a fool if I share this thing with others?" I've come a long way since mid March. I can say with confidence that I know we are called to adopt. Wow, that feels good to say. I don't know for sure where our children are? I've been waiting for God to plop a sum of money into my hands so that I can begin to pursue a home study, yet no money comes. What of this? In my frustration, I told the Lord, "I can't "jump" without funds to jump in with? Right?" So, I have done the only thing that I know to do, and that is sell the only assets that I have, my livestock. If the Lord is behind me, then I pray he lets my animals sell, and if he is not behind the international adoption path and doesn't provide the money needed for the home study, then I will be filling out paperwork with the state of Arkansas to adopt American children. Which ever way it goes, I am thrilled to just say it out loud, "We are jumping in! We are on the road to being adoptive parents."